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So, I hate my job


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#1 DivineMrsM

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Posted 29 June 2011 - 06:12 AM

Well, I don't hate it. But I don't want to be there anymore. I think my boss hates me. He has VERY little patience for me. I think he expects me to be like the other girls, though they have been there for over 10 years each. I have A LOT of stuff to learn and I try VERY hard not to eff up. But when I do, and it's always something minor, he laughs in my face and acts as though I'm the stupidest person on earth. He has an issue with my tattoos and asked me to cover them up, which is totally fine. I get it. But I think he's SO pissed off that he hired me not knowing that I had them, that he's trying to find excuses not to like me and to either fire me or get me to quit.

And really, I don't care if I work there or not. I LOVE the job itself. But he makes it really stressful. I try so hard not to make a mistake and when I do, and he treats me like I'm an idiot, it flusters me and makes me make even more silly mistakes. It's just a lot of small detail things that I have to remember to do and when he flusters me, I forget some steps. Nothing I can't fix, but still, they shouldn't happen.

But after I pay the kids' daycare, I come home with less money than I pay the sitter. So it's SO not worth it to me. I think on Thursday I'm finally going to stand up for myself. I want to have a talk with him and tell him how I have been feeling. Cuz really, what do I have to lose?? I don't NEED that job. If anything, I'm losing money by being there. In the LONG RUN, it would be a good job to have, but I don't think I'll last that long, the way things are now.

Would you talk to your boss if you were constantly being disrespected by him in your workplace? Or would you just take it like a b*tch? lol

I hope I get the balls to talk to him tomorrow. The man intimidates me and I don't like it.

#2 mysticmom

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Posted 29 June 2011 - 06:56 AM

If you are not comfortable and do not like the job, maybe you should move on. I have seen many more on the JobBank, lol!

#3 mysticmom

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Posted 29 June 2011 - 06:58 AM

If you are not comfortable and do not like the job, maybe you should move on. I have seen many more on the JobBank, lol!



http://jobs.windsors...=Indeed_Working

#4 DivineMrsM

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Posted 29 June 2011 - 07:15 AM

LOL! Thanks!

#5 kears

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Posted 29 June 2011 - 08:00 AM

Just try to be very diplomatic. Don't burn this bridge. Even if you'd never use him as a reference, don't do anything that may come back on you.

Other than that I do agree that you should likely say something to him. Life's too short to put up with constant poor treatment.

Good Luck!

#6 jenny

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Posted 29 June 2011 - 08:39 AM

I would try and talk to him. Maybe try to break down that barrier that's up. That is if you truly like your job. BUT...If you can't see yourself potentially doing this job in a year or 2 from now, just move on considering you said you don't need the job. KWIM?

That all said, I understand that it would be hard. I love my boss and she is one who has open door policy and we are welcome to discuss anything that bothers us, and even with that policy it is hard...so I can't imagine how much harder it would be when it's the boss disrespecting. But I think what you should do should boil down to if you can see yourself in this job in the future.

Good luck.

#7 zerodog

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Posted 29 June 2011 - 06:57 PM

I say keep your head down and tough it out.

#8 DivineMrsM

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Posted 29 June 2011 - 07:05 PM

I say keep your head down and tough it out.



But why? Why should I allow someone to treat me like crap? For money that I can make (DOUBLE) doing my other job?

#9 Sam

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Posted 29 June 2011 - 07:07 PM

I would perfect the job until you have him eating out of the palm of your hand, and then leave him high and dry when you find a better job.

#10 creative mama

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Posted 29 June 2011 - 07:24 PM

If you don't need the job at all, then I would talk to your boss and tell him what you're feeling. If things get better from there on out ... fabulous! If not, then I'd leave. I was in a position where I *had* to take massive abuse from the world's worst boss when I worked at Milne + Craighead. Totally not worth it.

#11 Aimster

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Posted 29 June 2011 - 07:31 PM

I worked for a networking company many years ago for a man who treated all of his female employees like crap, and treated the men like gold. The men would all go out to lunch together while the women were instructed to stay in the office during their lunch. I too didn't need the job and really hated working for this guy. One day, he came out of his office and asked me if I left a stack of papers on his chair. I said I didn't. He threw them up in the air and said, "What the hell good are they going to do my ass?!" and left them all over the floor. The bookkeeper ran out of her office and started to pick them up for fear he would get more aggravated.

I went into his office and closed the door. I told him that I really didn't NEED this job and that I didn't like working for someone who intimidated me. I told him that the other people in the office were very nice, but that he made my days miserable. I was so sure he was going to blow up and tell me to take a hike. Instead, he apologized for having made me feel uncomfortable and asked me to stay. He treated me like one of the guys ever since then and I actually came to like him.

But then I quit and went to work for Nortel. lol

I dunno. Take out of that story what you will. lmao

#12 zerodog

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Posted 29 June 2011 - 08:58 PM

But you just started working there. Everyone feels out of step for the first little while. Does everybody complain about the boss? Do the other employees feel you're being unfairly singled out, or is it your perception of it simply because you've convinced yourself that you want to quit?

Also, if you can make double the money at your other job, why did you even apply for this one? If it is because this job has more consistent wages and you need that, then stick with this one and "buck up". If you think that you can build a steady enough clientele with your other business to secure regular income, then quit this job and concentrate on the other. Make sure you weigh out all your options.

I don't doubt that you're feeling stressed out, Dana. It is simply my opinion that you tried so hard to get this job that you should think carefully before you make a decision.

#13 DivineMrsM

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Posted 29 June 2011 - 09:49 PM

But you just started working there. Everyone feels out of step for the first little while. Does everybody complain about the boss? Do the other employees feel you're being unfairly singled out, or is it your perception of it simply because you've convinced yourself that you want to quit?

Also, if you can make double the money at your other job, why did you even apply for this one? If it is because this job has more consistent wages and you need that, then stick with this one and "buck up". If you think that you can build a steady enough clientele with your other business to secure regular income, then quit this job and concentrate on the other. Make sure you weigh out all your options.

I don't doubt that you're feeling stressed out, Dana. It is simply my opinion that you tried so hard to get this job that you should think carefully before you make a decision.


No one talks in that office, so I'm not sure what they think! lol I applied for the job because I thought it was going to pay more, honestly. But after a few weeks and realizing that I am paying more in daycare than I am taking home, I really feel like it's not worth it to me. I'm losing days that I can't work my other job in order to work at this one that I feel...worthless at. It's a horrible feeling. I walk in there every morning with a feeling of dread. That I'm just teetering on the edge of embarrassment or termination or humiliation. It's awful!

I'm not gonna quit, I don't think. But I am going to talk to him and ask for some respect. If he chooses to keep me, great. If things don't get better after that, then I will quit. I can find a serving job in the meantime and make likely MORE money than I make there, kwim?

I just gotta grow some balls and demand the respect that I very much deserve. NO ONE, for any amount of money, deserves to be treated with disrespect.

I do know what you mean, Karen. But in my heart, I don't think it's worth it. I NEED to stick up for myself this time.

#14 scrappy survivor

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Posted 29 June 2011 - 09:52 PM

I tend to agree with zero on this one.... I do think having a conversation along the lines of how hard you are trying and have you done something to upset him becuase you feel some friction between the two of you is not a bad thing. Especially if this job could be a really good one in the future. He may just be testing you to see if you can hack it. Afterall he ahs 90 days to fire with you & needs no reason at all!

#15 Jen K

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Posted 29 June 2011 - 09:54 PM

Its a bad spot for you to be in..
Maybe ask him for a review?

#16 DivineMrsM

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Posted 30 June 2011 - 05:48 AM

LOL So I wake up this morning and this is what I see on TV.

Everyone makes mistakesóbut some of those mistakes are more avoidable than others. When it comes to your job, even just one mistake could result in major consequences for your career.

Impress your employer by avoiding the following mistakes:

Mistake #1: Being unavailable (Doesn't apply to me)

Itís inevitable that, at some point, your supervisor or co-workers will approach you and ask for your help on an outside project or assignment. Although it might be tempting ignore those emails or say no to additional work, donít. You might think that no one will notice if you donít help with extra work, but they will. And, although itís not technically in your job description, more companies today must do more with lessómeaning each employee needs to be flexible and multi-skilled. Make yourself indispensible by pitching in on other assignments when possible. (Of course, donít overextend yourself to the point where you canít get your normal work done.)

[See 12 Common Work Email Mistakes.]

Mistake #2: Failing to dress to impress (Doesn't apply)

Some of the best job advice Iíve heard is to to always dress at least one step above your current position. It helps others picture you working above your current position and makes you look extremely professional. Youíre not just an intern/entry-level professional, you have the potential to be so much moreóso act like it.

Mistake #3: Trying to complete every task to perfection (LOL! Yeah, my boss needs to see this one)

No one is perfect. And while doing projects to the best of your ability is something you should strive to do, it doesnít mean youíll never make a mistake or do something incorrectly. If you make a mistake, own up to it and correct it. Remember to not lose sight of the overall goal by focusing too much on the little details. You could potentially miss deadlines and quality of your workónot to mention drive your co-workers (and boss) crazy.

Mistake #4: Waiting for feedback (lol)

Many workplaces still donít give employees feedback more than a few times per year. If you wait around for feedback for several months, youíre doing yourself (and your organization) a disservice. Instead of waiting for your supervisor to come to you, ask to set up a quick meeting to discuss your progress thus far and any improvements you could make. Bring up specific projects youíve completed and ask for feedback on things you were unsure about. This way, you know where you stand in your position and at the companyóbefore a formal performance review comes across your desk.

[See How to Mesh In-Person and Online Networking.]

Mistake #5: Hiding out at your desk (Umm, we're expected to do this)

Even if youíre doing spectacular work, you could be overlooked if you sit at your desk each day and avoid interactions with co-workers and upper management. When you need a break, head over to the break room or cafeteria and interact with other workers in your office. Not only will this help reduce stress on the job, but youíll have the potential to make some great professional relationships, too.

Mistake #6: Not asking questions (I ask questions and get treated like an idiot)

Some people think asking questions is a sign of weakness. But when youíre unsure how to complete a task, it can be hard to do it the right way the first time without clarification. When assigned a new project, ask any questions that might come up right then and there. You might also want to inquire about how your success will be measured and how often you should update your boss on the progress. Your supervisor would much rather that you ask questions now in order to avoid potential problems later.

[See Why Loving Your Work Matters.]

Mistake #7: Ignoring the corporate culture (lol)

When you first start on a new job, itís important to take note of cultural differences from previous workplaces. What does everyone wear on a daily basis? How much socialization goes on during the workday? Do employees tend to come in early or stay late? What is the typical mode of communication for the office? Assimilating to the culture is a great way to fit in quickly at the organization and get along with other employees.

#17 DivineMrsM

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Posted 30 June 2011 - 06:24 AM

Also, how do I teach my boys to stand up for themselves if I don't have the balls to do it for ME?

The more I think about it, the more I KNOW I have to say something. Like I said, I'm not quitting. But I'm going to give him the opportunity to have an out if he wants me gone. Obviously, he doesn't need my permission, but I want him to know that I am aware of the environment he has me working in. He can't expect me to be as good as the other girls who work there just yet. I've been there a month. After 6 DAYS he was giving me shit for not being fast enough. 126 hours, and he was telling me that I wasn't good enough. Come on.

Aimster, I HOPE that that's how this convo will turn out, but I somehow doubt it! LOL! But maybe me standing up for myself will help him show me a little respect. A girl can hope, no? lol

#18 jenny

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Posted 30 June 2011 - 08:24 AM

Good luck Dana! Let us know how it turns out. You can stand up for yourself and do so in a respectful manner that will teach your boys that. Everyone deserves to be treated with respect. I hope it all works out for you.

#19 Leanne

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Posted 30 June 2011 - 01:00 PM

wow Dana, I can relate to what you are saying. I had just gone back to work after having my oldest- i started a new job through a placement agency- i was hired on as accounts payable and receivable along with receptionist. they hired me without any accounting experience=- and told me that they liked it that way- they could teach me how they want me to learn. ( i interviewed with my supervisor- but he was not training me) so on day 2 I had walked back to my co-worker asking her a question- she answered me with a sarcastic answer as if i should have known. In the next breath told me "next time don't bother me when i am sitting here on a break". I was belittled to feel less superior then the rest- I would have to walk through the shop part to get in to the office- i heard people calling out to me... and i am not talking Hi or morning! they would center me out if i made a mistake- but were not willing to take the time to show me. i think it was day 7 i thought i was going to by pass my trainer and speak with my supervisor- whom i had only seen during my interview. I went in ( and i hate confrontation) and i asked if i could speak with him. I told him while i was trying my best i was wondering if there was somthing else i could do differently- and how he thought i was doing. He replied with "well it isn't really working out how i want- you've become a disruption at work" I was very confused- i asked if he could let me know what i had done for him to feel that way- and he said i bothered the employees in the shop and i was asking questions to my trainer and she wasn't getting her work done. I went back to my desk- I was upset- i was doing the best i could -
In the end i ended up saying enough was enough i went into to quit the next morning but i found i no longer had a punch card- when i questioned it my trainer said oh ( supervisor ) said we will no longer need you here. and told me they would escort me out- walked me to my car -
I had never been let go from a job- but i will tell you I had never been happier.
so while i don't think youj should just quit I think you should talk with him- just ask him how he feels you are working out?

good luck!

#20 Rox028802

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Posted 30 June 2011 - 02:14 PM

how did u it go?

#21 DivineMrsM

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Posted 30 June 2011 - 05:13 PM

It actually went really well! I talked to him and he appreciated that I did. He said he doesn't mean to get so frustrated with me as he realizes that I AM improving and doing my best. He said he realizes that I have very little experience in the work I am doing, so I have to learn everything from scratch and that it will take a lot of time. He said he gets stressed out from his own job, that sometimes it gets directed at me and he apologized!

So he was actually REALLY good about it and I still have a job! lol Felt really good to stick up for myself too. He said he admired that I came and talked to him about it.

YAY!!! I feel SO much better now!!!

Thank you for the support, guys!!

#22 jenny

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Posted 30 June 2011 - 05:19 PM

Wooohoooo!

#23 Jen K

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Posted 30 June 2011 - 05:24 PM

That is great news!

#24 Rox028802

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Posted 30 June 2011 - 05:38 PM

YAY! glad it turned out alright, I hope work is a more pleasent experience from now on. and maybe you can look forward to it a little more...

#25 cbarker78

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Posted 30 June 2011 - 06:16 PM

AWESOME!!! Way to go!!!!

#26 Gillian

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Posted 30 June 2011 - 07:13 PM

What kind of work do you do, Dana?

#27 DivineMrsM

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Posted 30 June 2011 - 07:14 PM

The job is as a legal assistant.

#28 Gillian

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Posted 30 June 2011 - 07:17 PM

Well, that is a tough job to do if you don't have the experience. I'm glad you had a talk with him and that we was understanding. Good for you :)

#29 DivineMrsM

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Posted 30 June 2011 - 07:23 PM

It is challenging for sure! I like the work!

Edited by DivineMrsM, 30 June 2011 - 07:24 PM.


#30 Jenn1980

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Posted 30 June 2011 - 09:15 PM

First off, WTG!, second, do you have any schooling in this field? I have all this leg work to do with the second career thingy. I am contemplating the Law Clerk program and my worker told me i had to prove there are employers in this field that would hire a new graduate. To top it off, i need written proof.

#31 DivineMrsM

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Posted 30 June 2011 - 09:33 PM

Normally, yes, you need school. My boss took a chance on me, but the other girls he hired did have school. It's a legal assistant program, I believe.

#32 Jill

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Posted 01 July 2011 - 08:54 AM

Awesome! I'm glad you listened to your own instinct and talked to him! No one should ever be treated badly, even from their boss.. That's just total crap. I am very glad to hear you didn't "buck up" for the sake of a job. What about self-respect? If you don't respect yourself, no one else will! :)

Congrats, and I hope from here on out, he makes more of an effort to be patient with you!